Hope.

Hope — it is the quintessential human delusion, simultaneously the source of your greatest strength and your greatest weakness.

I have been itching to write lately. I sit down, start out with a few sentences...but nothing sounds right, so I end up scrapping it all. Today is different. I've got things in my head that I need to get out.

Always remember to tell the important people in your life how much they mean. Don't ever take a moment for granted. Life is really too fragile to not be honest, seize the day, live in the moment, and love with your whole heart.

The past few months have truly been the harbingers of change. Change and I have an interesting relationship. It never seems to happen gradually. Always in one giant downpour, which turns into sprinkles that seem to go on forever. I'm learning how to embrace being in the rain. How to make my way through the puddles. Because I've learned that wishing for sun won't always make the rain go away.

So, I am amped (spell check tells me that amped isn't a word, btw) to grab life by the horns and start making some changes of my own...maybe that way the other changes won't seem so big. To be honest...all the change hasn't been bad. I'm strengthening relationships with my momma, some old friends, some new friends, myself and God. I've never been overly religious, or had a church that I attended regularly...But I'm finding that when I need someone to just listen, He's been pretty awesome.

"At the end of the day, give your troubles to God. He will be up all night anyway."

I booked my trip to SF yesterday. I cannot wait to get out of town for a few days. I'm planning on documenting my adventure and reconnecting with an old HS friend who I haven't seen in ages. Pretty sure this trip will be amazing for the soul...which is just what I need. :] Hopefully the weather will be good.

I'm also working on lifestyle changes...which means hasta pasta to diet coke, sweet stuff, and all the glorious junk that used to fill my tummy. I'm feeling fantastic and it's only been a few days. I've never been disciplined in the way of changing how I eat. I would constantly complain, find ways to cheat and sabotage myself. There is something different this time...I'm jumping right in with both feet and I couldn't be happier with myself. Looking forward to seeing the impact this has on my life, body, and energy over the next few weeks.

I've also got my family's christmas party coming up this weekend. It is an event I look forward to every year. This year is no exception...should be interesting. All my worlds colliding under one roof...definitly not one of my favorite things...Haha, but nothing can be worse than last year...I've got high hopes for this one. My final struggle is what to wear...i've got a few days. :]

Hoping the rest of the week brings some good news. or good friends. or just good in general.
til next time.

lovelovelove,

s